Dave Barry on man-vs.-snake Everglades smackdown

Would you like to make some extra money, and at the same time run the risk of being eaten by a carnivorous reptile the size of a war canoe?

If your answer is “yes,” I have an exciting opportunity for you. It’s called the Python Challenge, and I am not making it up. It’s a real event that was dreamed up by the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission, which apparently was concerned that Florida does not seem insane enough to people in normal states.

The Python Challenge is a month-long contest; its purpose, according to the official website (pythonchallenge.org) is “to raise public awareness about Burmese pythons.”

Q. What do they mean by “raise public awareness about?”

A. They mean “kill.”

The contest is open to anybody who registers, pays a $25 fee and takes an online training course; so far about 400 people have signed up. These people have from Jan. 12 through Feb. 10 to go out in the Everglades and raise public awareness on as many pythons as they can. There’s a $1,500 prize for whoever kills the most pythons, a $1,000 prize for whoever kills the longest python, and a $500 prize for whoever kills the python with the best personality.

I’m kidding about that last prize, of course. Burmese pythons do not have personalities: All they do is eat and destroy the ecosystem. They are the teenage males of the animal kingdom. That’s why the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission is trying to get rid of them.

Be advised, however, that you cannot kill these pythons any old way you want. No, sir: This is an official state-sponsored event, and if there is one word that comes to mind whenever you hear the name “Florida,” that word is “ethics.” The Python Challenge guidelines clearly state that you have — this is an actual quote — “an ethical obligation to ensure a Burmese python is killed in a humane manner.” That means you cannot kill your python using cruel and inhumane methods such as forcing it to watch Here Comes Honey Boo Boo until it commits suicide, or placing it at the entrance to a Boca Raton restaurant just as the Early Bird special begins, where it would be trampled to death in seconds.

So how do you ethically kill a Burmese python? According to the Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission, you can use a device called a “captive bolt,” or you can shoot it in the head with a firearm of “a safe, but effective caliber.” (Got that? You want your caliber to be safe, but also effective.)

You are also permitted to whack off the python’s head with a machete, provided you do so in an ethical manner. To quote the commission: “Make sure your technique results in immediate loss of consciousness and destruction of the Burmese python’s brain.” (If you think I’m making any of this up, I urge you to go read the Python Challenge guidelines.)

One thing the guidelines are not very specific about is how you’re supposed to catch the python in the first place. I happen to have some experience in this area. A few years ago, I captured a snake that somehow got into my office and onto my desk, despite the fact that I live in Coral Gables, where snakes are a clear violation of the zoning code. The technique I used to capture this particular snake was as follows:

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Microsoft may have exited gadget show prematurely

LAS VEGAS (AP) — Microsoft may have relinquished its starring role in America’s gaudiest gadget show a year too early.

After 13 straight years in the spotlight, Microsoft’s decision to scale back its presence at this week’s International CES deprived the software maker of a prime opportunity to explain and promote a new generation of redesigned computers running its radically remade Windows operating system.

The missed chance comes at a time when Microsoft Corp. could use a bully pulpit to counter perceptions that Windows 8 isn’t compelling enough to turn the technological tide away from smartphones and tablets running software made by Apple Inc. and Google Inc.

“They needed to be at this show in a very big way to show the progress they have made and what is it about 2013 that is going to make consumers really gravitate toward a Windows 8 machine,” said technology industry analyst Patrick Moorhead.

Since Windows 8 went on sale in late October, there has been little evidence to suggest the operating system will lift the personal computer industry out of a deepening downturn. Worldwide PC shipments during the final three months of last year dropped 6 percent from the same period in 2011, according to the research firm International Data Corp. The dip occurred despite the bevy of Windows 8 laptops and desktop machines that were on sale during the holiday shopping season.

Microsoft, though, insists things worked out at just fine during CES, even though it didn’t have a booth and only had a smattering of executives at the sprawling trade show, which drew some 156,000 people to Las Vegas.

The company, which is based in Redmond, Wash., decided it no longer makes sense to invest as much time and money in CES as it once did. The company says the show’s early January slot doesn’t mesh with the timing of its major product releases. Windows 8, for instance, was still more than nine months away from hitting the market when Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer kicked off last year’s CES with a keynote address that was billed as the company’s swan song at the show.

“We are very comfortable with our decision,” Microsoft spokesman Frank Shaw said. “It has been a productive show for us this year.”

Microsoft’s retreat from CES puzzled some attendees curious about Windows 8. For instance, when Michael Sullivan showed up at computer maker Asus’ booth, which was stocked with Windows 8 computers, there was no one around to discuss the machines or the software.

“This is unusual,” said Sullivan, CEO of computer sales firm Spec 4 International Inc. “I don’t understand why a successful company isn’t bringing executives here.”

Asus invited some CES attendees to learn more about Windows 8 at a nearby hotel, away from the show’s main trade show. Asus has left its booth unmanned in previous years at CES, but the void wasn’t as noticeable when Microsoft’s own representatives were canvassing the floor.

NPD DisplaySearch analyst Richard Shim thought Microsoft should have had more people helping to staff its partners’ booths because, he said, no one understands how Windows 8 works better than the company that made it.

“Whenever you have a new product rolling out, it’s always helpful to communicate your message directly as opposed to counting on your partners,” Shim said.

Microsoft elected to curtail its CES presence largely because the show’s marketing value has diminished. In recent years, companies such as Apple and Google have shown that they can command more attention by holding their own exclusive events to unveil products just before they go on sale. Neither Apple nor Google had a major presence at CES.

In a sign that it is embracing its rivals’ strategy, Microsoft staged separate events last year in Los Angeles and New York to unveil Surface, a Windows-powered tablet computer, and Windows 8.

Nevertheless, both Shim and Moorhead believe would have been better off waiting until after this year’s CES to surrender its top billing on the marquee. That way, Ballmer could have used this year’s opening CES keynote to talk about Windows 8′s advantages as a finished product.

“Ballmer could have talked about the operating system more completely and built more hype around it, especially since Microsoft has been getting beaten up so far over Windows 8′s performance,” Shim said.

When Ballmer ended Microsoft’s 13-year streak of kicking off CES, he was only able to provide a peek at a makeover of the operating system that was still months away from being completed.

Microsoft touts Windows 8 as a breakthrough that will enable people to straddle the divide between personal computers and tablets. The revamped operating system is built to respond to the touch of a finger so it can work on tablet computers while still retaining the ability to respond to commands from keyboards and mice on laptop and desktop machines. To take advantage of Windows 8′s versatility, many PC makers are building convertible devices that can work as a tablet or a laptop.

But reviews of the new operating system have been lukewarm. Critics have been panning it as too confusing and cumbersome.

Microsoft used part of a CES technology forum presented by J.P. Morgan to try to build more enthusiasm. The company revealed that 60 million copies of Windows 8 have been sold so far, putting it on the same pace as the previous version — Windows 7 — at the same juncture of its release. But it’s unclear how many of those Windows 8 licenses are installed on computers that are still sitting in stores or warehouses.

Investors have been so unimpressed with the reception to the new Windows products that Microsoft’s stock price has slipped 4 percent since the operating system’s Oct. 26 release. Meanwhile, the bellwether Standard & Poor’s 500 index has gained 4 percent. Microsoft’s stock closed Friday at $ 26.83, up 37 cents.

A clearer picture of the early reception to Windows 8 may emerge Jan. 24 when Microsoft is scheduled to report its earnings for the three months spanning the holiday shopping season.

Although he wasn’t the main attraction, Ballmer made a cameo appearance during Qualcomm Inc. CEO Paul Jacobs’ opening address at this year’s show.

Ballmer’s acceptance of Qualcomm’s invitation to join Jacobs on stage surprised some people because Qualcomm has emerged as a threat to Intel Corp., a longtime Microsoft ally that makes most of the processors in Windows computers. Instead of touting Windows 8, Ballmer spent his time hailing a streamlined version of the operating system, dubbed Windows RT, which runs on tablets using processors that rely on technology designed by ARM, another Intel rival.

Microsoft’s top executive in charge of technical strategy appeared on stage at Samsung Electronics’ invitation to reveal a Windows phone featuring a flexible color display. The electronics of the phone are in a little box, and the thin, bendable screen is attached to it, looking much like a piece of paper.

That left Intel and other Microsoft partners, including PC makers Samsung, Sony, Asus, Acer and Hewlett-Packard Co., to do most of the boasting about Windows 8 at their own CES booths.

“Our partners are doing that very effectively,” Shaw said. “You couldn’t walk through the (CES) floor without seeing people doing really interesting things with Windows 8.”

But there were other times when it appeared Microsoft’s partners could have used some help.

Sony exhibitor John Guzman, for instance, seemed stumped when an Associated Press reporter visited the company’s CES booth and asked whether a machine running Windows 8 or the more advanced Windows 8 Pro would be a better fit for journalistic work.

“That is more of a Microsoft question,” Guzman said, adding that no Microsoft representatives were around.

___

Liedtke reported from San Francisco. AP Technology Writer Peter Svensson contributed to this story.

Gadgets News Headlines – Yahoo! News

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Buzzmakers: Dina Lohan's Black Eye And New The Voice Clips

What had ET readers buzzing this week?

1. Dina Lohan's Black Eye Photos

Following Dina Lohan's shocking claims that her husband Michael abused her during their marriage (and Michael's denial), ET has obtained vintage photos of the mother of four with a black eye.

Click here for the shocking pics.

2. 'The Voice' Coaches Dish on New Season

It looks like Adam Levine is off the hook for the upcoming season of The Voice, as Blake Shelton has a new man crush on Usher.

During the Television Critics Association Press Tour, the singers revealed that Shelton's uncomfortable advances towards Levine -- done in jest -- have now been turned to the newest male addition on the coaching panel.

"He's left me for Usher now," Levine joked. "So he gets to spend the season making Usher feel uncomfortable."

"And I think I'm doing a really good job of that, by the way," Shelton added. "I've said and done about everything that crosses the line."

While Shelton's focused on Usher, the rest of the fellas seem to have eyes for Shakira, who will also be joining the show for the upcoming season.

"She's so sexy," said host Carson Daly.

"She's a sweetheart," Levine agreed.

Season four of The Voice premieres March 25 on NBC. Click here for the panel's new interviews!

3. Miranda Lambert Defends Her Chris Brown Comments

Country crooner Miranda Lambert has no intention of retracting her statements made this past year about R&B singer Chris Brown and his domestic abuse in 2009 towards his on-again, off-again girlfriend Rihanna.

At the Grammy Awards this past year, Lambert, 29, tweeted following Brown's performance, writing: "He beat on a girl. not cool that we act like that didn't happen."

"I didn't feel right about not saying something. The loudmouth that I am, I say what I think," she told Redbook magazine of the tweet. "I wanted everyone to know that I don't agree with the message it's sending to young women."

Adding to her opinion of Brown, Lambert, who is married to The Voice judge Blake Shelton, said, "It's not okay. At all. To be celebrated after doing something like that. I don't think it's right, I never will, and I will stand by what I said till the day that I die."

4. Diane Lane After Husband Josh Brolin's Arrest

As news broke of Josh Brolin's New Year's Day arrest, ET caught up with Brolin's wife Diane Lane at the Palm Springs International Film Festival, where she appeared sans her husband.

Lane arrived cheerful and relaxed alongside her Nights of Rodanthe co-star Richard Gere, whom she presented the Chairman's Award.

"[Brolin] is actually with my wife [actress Carey Lowell] tonight, so everything's fine," joked Gere when asked how Brolin felt about missing the event.

"We have an arrangement," Lane kidded. "It's all good."

5. Fierce Fashions: The 2013 People's Choice Awards

The sparkling stars of film, TV and music donned their red carpet best as they kicked off awards season Wednesday night at the 2013 People's Choice Awards in Los Angeles.

Visit our gallery for all the stunning styles!

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Flu outbreak leads NY to declare public health emergency

The state of New York declared a public health emergency today amid the worst flu outbreak in years.

Gov. Cuomo pushed through legislation that allows pharmacies to administer flu shots to kids — not just adults — to combat the sickness.

New York has already been blasted with more than three times as many flu cases this year than last.

Cases are up from roughly 4,400 to 19,100 and two children have already died this year, according to the New York State Department of Health.

“All New Yorkers, children and adults alike, [should] have access to critically needed flu vaccines,” Cuomo said.

Kids under 18 years old can now recieve a flu vaccination, which is effective in 62 percent of cases, according to the US Centers for Disease Control.

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Miami Beach builder Robert Turchin looks back — and ahead

If former Miami Beach vice mayor Robert Turchin had been a Miami decision maker during the recent vote that decided the fate of The Miami Herald building, he would probably have voted with the ‘nays’ allowing its demolition.

“There’s nothing special about it,” says the 90-year-old Turchin as he cruises Collins Avenue between 63rd and 48th streets, a strip dense with buildings from the same period as the Herald’s — specimens of post-war Miami Modern (MiMo) architecture that he constructed.

It is no exaggeration to say that Turchin built much of post-war Miami Beach, collaborating with Melvin Grossman, Morris Lapidus and other MiMo period architects. From 1945 to 1985, his firm was the busiest in the building trade. Royal York, Montmartre, Moulin Rouge, King Cole, Charter Club, Four Ambassadors — the list goes on, numbering upward of 100 buildings.

“I grew up when Miami Beach was a small town. It was 1945, and the hotels would close during the summer for renovations because they had no air conditioning. I couldn’t wait for summers, when I would return from school and work on the construction sites,” Turchin says.

In an era when hotel signs sometimes read “No Jews or dogs,” Turchin’s father was a successful builder who hoped his son would be a diplomat. It was not to be. After serving in World War II, for which he recently received a French Legion of Honor medal, he started his first project. Like subsequent ones, it broke the mold.

“The GI Bill made housing affordable for veterans, but it was single-family housing. I wanted to build a four-family unit under the bill,” Turchin says. It was an unprecedented proposal that went from city to state to federal agencies before it was approved. The multi-unit buildings launched the concept of condominiums.

As did other builders, he began to experiment with air conditioning. “Once we were able to air condition them, the hotels stayed open year-round. The beach boomed then,” he says.

Buildings came down to make way for new ones. Turchin’s Morton Towers went up where Carl Fisher’s circa 1920 Flamingo Hotel stood on 15 acres. “The land had become more valuable than the building,” he explains.

Turchin became known as “the builder’s builder” for riding to the top floor of construction sites on the hook of a crane, and walking the beams to inspect the work. His view of the built landscape was daring, pragmatic, and often at odds with those of preservationists like Nancy Liebman, a Miami Beach city commissioner from 1993 to 2001 who served with Turchin on the city’s first historic preservation board.

“A lot of the beautiful mansions on the bay and beach were lost to that kind of development,” laments Liebman. “It was the typical mentality of throw it away and build something new.”

But Turchin was building for the next generation. To him, the Art Deco buildings of his father’s generation — Edgewater Beach, the Sands and the Sea Isle where he honeymooned with his wife — were old school.

“They made no sense. They were all building with a few trees in front. They weren’t called Deco back then. Curlicues on concrete is how we thought of them,” he says.

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South Florida man charged with brewing moonshine in his backyard

Authorities say they have arrested a 23-year-old man who has been distilling and selling moonshine at his Lantana home.

Daniel David Pawa is in the Palm Beach County Jail this morning facing charges including possessing moonshine, conspiracy to violate beverage laws and possessing a fire arm, according to the Florida Department of Business and Professional Regulation.

Department officials say Pawa was arrested early this morning in Lantana by agents from their Division of Alcoholic Beverages and Tobacco. The address of Pawa’s West Palm Beach home, where authorities say he was cooking the alcohol, was not immediately available.

Authorities did say that undercover agents had bought more than 40 gallons of moonshine from Pawa. When they searched his home they found a moonshine still, liquor bottles, a hydrometer, mason jars and a .45 caliber gun.

Possession of the gun is the most serious charge, a second degree felony punishable by up to 15 years in prison and up to $10,000 in fines. Pawa faces four other charges, all third-degree felonies that could earn him up to five years in prison and/or up to a $5,000 fine for each should he be found guilty.

The West Palm Beach and Lantana police departments assisted with the arrest and securing the home. The address where Pawa was arrested was also not immediately available.

The Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office bomb squad responded to scene when a grenade was found during the search, according

to the department.

Authorities are still looking for two other individuals they believe were in on the moonshining operation.

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Sprint confirms it will launch BlackBerry 10 later this year

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Taylor Swift Grammy Promo

Multiple Grammy-award winning Taylor Swift appropriately graces 2013's first Grammy promo, which features the 23-year-old superstar inspiring the next generation of music virtuosos and legends.

The short clip is the first of The Recording Academy's ad campaign for this year's Grammys titled #TheWorldIsListening, which will feature both established and up-and-coming artists. The artists confirmed to be involved include Rihanna, who will tell her story in the first commercial titled "Slammed Door," while the Kills, Snoop Lion and Taylor Swift appear alongside emerging artists such as Grace Potter, Kishi Bashi and Dam-Funk in the second commercial. The Black Keys appear in the third and last commercial, titled "Soundcheck."

Related: The 2013 Grammy Nominations

In addition, #TheWorldIsListening campaign has created a new website, www.grammyamplifier.com, that allows musicians to share their tracks via SoundCloud for a chance to have their music tweeted out by a panel of musical icons, including Linkin Park, RZA, and Snoop Lion.

The ultimate goal? Giving emerging artists who have the potential to be the next generation of Grammy winners a serious platform.

Video: Grammys Flashback '05 -- Kanye Wins First of Many

The 55th Annual Grammy Awards airs Sunday, Feb. 10, 2013 on CBS at 8 p.m.

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Newark Mayor Cory Booker files paperwork to raise money for his 2014 Senate run

Newark Mayor Cory Booker has filed paperwork allowing him to raise money to run for the US Senate in 2014, setting up intrigue over his political future and that of 89-year-old Frank Lautenberg, who currently holds the seat.

Booker made the filing Tuesday with the Federal Election Commission. The prolific social media user has not tweeted about it or made any public announcements about the filing.

But it came as no surprise. Booker, perhaps New Jersey's highest-profile Democratic politician, announced last month that he would not challenge Republican incumbent Chris Christie and run for governor in 2013. Instead, Booker said, he was looking at a run for the Senate next year.

WireImage for Glamour Magazine

Mayor Cory Booker speaks onstage at the 22nd annual Glamour Women of the Year Awards at Carnegie Hall in November.

US Rep. Frank Pallone, a Democrat from central New Jersey, has also expressed interest in the seat.

The interest puts some pressure on Lautenberg, the oldest member of the Senate.

When Booker said he might run for the seat, he praised Lautenberg for his service, but said he had not spoken with him about his plans. Through a spokesman, Lautenberg declined to talk about his political future.

But so far, he has not given any indication that he would like to retire.

And Booker has not said whether he would be willing to take on Lautenberg in a primary run if the senator tries to keep his seat.

Spokesmen for Pallone, Lautenberg and Booker did not immediately return calls to the Associated Press.

In 2008, New Jersey's Democratic establishment decided that Lautenberg was not too old to serve.

US Rep. Rob Andrews challenged him a primary. Most of the state's Democratic leaders stood with Lautenberg, who won handily then retained his seat in the general election.

Booker has 1.3 million Twitter followers and is known for responding to constituent complaints sent to him electronically. During Superstorm Sandy, he invited residents to charge their cellphones at his house. In April, he let the world know through Twitter that he rushed into his neighbor's house and rescued her from a fire. During a snowstorm, he helped shovel people out. And he recently finished spending a week living on a food stamps-level food budget as part of a challenge that came from a Twitter follower.

He was elected mayor of Newark in 2006 with 72 percent of the vote, four years after narrowly losing a bruising battle against longtime Mayor Sharpe James. The race was chronicled in the 2005 documentary "Street Fight." He was re-elected in 2010 with about 60 percent of the vote

A Stanford-educated Rhodes Scholar who grew up in suburban Harrington Park, NJ, Booker is the son of civil rights activists who were among the first black executives at IBM. He got his law degree from Yale Law School, then moved to one of Newark's most notoriously violent housing projects.

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Legal feud over Spanish-language TV leads to federal suit in Miami

What began as a highly-touted affiliation between a new Spanish-language national television network and a popular independent local station in Miami has dissolved into a legal dispute of David and Goliath proportions.

MundoFox Broadcasting, part of the family of communications giant News Corporation, filed suit in the U.S. District Court Southern District of Florida against the parent company of America Tevé Channel 41-WJAN, America-CV Network, for breaching two agreements forged in May.

The complaint alleges that in South Florida "MundoFox’s initial launch had less exposure, viewership was lower, soliciting advertisers became more difficult and advertising revenue decreased,” because the network was swapped to inferior channel positions by cable providers.

In a statement, America-CV Network, denied the allegations in the complaint and announced that it will defend itself vigorously.

— DANIEL SHOER ROTH

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